She's pregnant? Tips on how to handle this.
Your partner has just told you that she's pregnant, and life as you know it has just changed. Surprised, scared, happy, upset? You may be dealing with a lot of emotions right now, so you should know that your feelings are valid and normal. The first thing you have to do is STAY CALM. You always want to stay calm, controlled and supportive, because she is looking to you for help and guidance.
Here are some Do's and Don'ts to help you through this:
Don'ts:
- Don't assume that she wants to be pregnant and carry to term.
- Don't assume that she wants to abort the pregnancy.
- Don't assume abortion is the "easy way out.â€
- Don't assume that she is not considering adoption.
- Don't assume that she was trying to get pregnant on purpose.
Do's:
- Do make her health your top priority.
- Do take her someplace to see a health professional.
- Do encourage her to get a sonogram.
- Do talk openly and honestly about all the options: parenting, abortion, and adoption.
- Do help and stay involved if she does decide to parent.
Remember the decision is ultimately hers to make. You should be able to express your opinion but you should never force her into a decision.
Real Options is here for you. Yes, we will provide her with excellent advice and medical care but we are also here to give you crucial information and guidance through this very difficult and confusing time. We have trained male volunteers ready and available to walk through the information you NEED to know.
You may be thinking, "Why are they so interested in me? I thought this was a woman's choice.â€Â The reason is that her decision can and will have a direct affect on you as an individual. If she decides to have an abortion, how will that impact your emotions? If she decides to carry to term and give birth, what will your responsibilities be? Are you ready to pay child support if you decide not to marry? Are you ready to be a "Dad†to this new person?
Men, it's time that to stand up and take part in your pregnant partner's life. She needs to know that you care and you are ready to walk through this with her.
- If she decides to parent, be "man enough†to be a dad.
- If she decides to allow someone to adopt the baby, be "man enough†to assist her to choose a great family.
- If she is considering abortion, be "man enough†to get her accurate and caring counsel.
Men, remember that it took you to help create this pregnancy, so stand up and help create a wonderful outcome.